I don’t care what anyone says, but the hardest break-up that a woman can have, is the one with her best friend!!!
Many of us have our different definitions of what a best friend is… for me the equation is not that simple, although I wish it was. In the Pythagorean Theorem you have a² + b² = c², this seems simple enough right?! Well let me break down my equation of what a best friend looks like…
Loyalty+communication+honesty+hangout+sharing secrets+ride or die+answer my texts and calls all the time+listen to my boy problems= Best Friend For Life!!!
This equation that I have conjured up may seem like a lot to ask, but these are my expectations of what I want in a best friend or what I thought I wanted in a best friend. The one thing that I find with guys is that when they get into it with their homeboy it seems like there’s no bad blood or any type of emotion when there is a riff in the friendship. With us women it’s damn near like a relationship, all of the emotions, attitude, drama, blocking on social media, unfriending someone, talking shit behind their back, or even taking it to the point of verbally slandering that persons name. I’ve had my share of these immature antics, but needless to say, we as women can be vicious creatures and at times hold our friends up to these unrealistic expectations. Sometimes friendships take different forms and shapes and that is okay. Sometimes people are in your life for a reason or a season and that is okay too! But make sure you can differentiate who is a friend or foe!
Growing up I didn’t have the healthiest of friendships, I wasn’t the popular girl in high school, but for some reason everybody knew me and I had a variety of associates from all different shapes, sizes, colors, nationality’s, you name it. I would go above and beyond for people because that’s what made me feel good, not thinking I would get anything in return, but that’s what filled my soul at that time. As I’ve gotten older my circle has gotten smaller and smaller and smaller. It’s a sad thing to happen, but you start to realize who is truly there for you. Who has been there through the heartaches and rough times, and who will stick with you no matter if you chose to date that no good guy you said you were going to break up with 20 different times! Lol
I would like to describe my personality for someone who doesn’t know how I operate with my friends… I can get very territorial, jealous, bratty, and a little obnoxious with my brattiness! Lol! I’m super tough on the outside, but my damn feelings get hurt easily and at times it is hard for me to admit when I’m wrong, but if I really love yo ass, I’ll apologize!
As I have gotten older, I have realized that some of my energy I need to save for myself and that is okay, it is okay to take some space from your friends… unless you’re friends with one of my besties. When I tell her I need space, she literally gives me 24 hours and then she’s right back on my phone face timing me and forcing me out of my funk! Lol! At a time right now in my life I’ve recognized who is a friend or foe. I feel like having little disagreements with your friend or doing petty social media antics, isn’t any justification of how your friendship will be in the future. And as I’ve learned recently, you need to be kind to yourself and those that you call your best friends. This life is already tough as it is and we need all the support we can get. So if you got a bestie, keep them close to your heart and make sure to nurture those friendships the best way you know how. Rome wasn’t built in a day! You never know when you’ll need someone to talk to, someone to vent to, or a shoulder to cry on through those tough times. Yes you may have a significant other, but you also need that girl time or that guy time to feed your soul and to remember that you’re not alone in this life.
Shout out to everybody out there that’s holding their friends down the best way they know how. And shout out to the foes, we see y’all and we staying 50 feet away from that energy. We got some wolfs out here in sheep’s clothing… so stay far far away from that energy. And if you’re looking for a friend that’s going to ride for you… I’m your girl!
Please comment and share. This is a safe, fun, and nonjudgmental space… use it for those purposes!
But until next time peeps continue to be CONFIDENTLY AWKWARD… UNAPOLOGETICALLY that is!!!
-xoxo
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